Login to ZARP

TOPIC: Im Resigning.

Im Resigning. 7 years 6 months ago #434581

Wait what? Revine is resigning?
Yes. I am.

I don't really know how to begin, but I'll just be honest here so if you wanna read - do it. If not, don't waste your time here.

Lately, I've been kind of inactive. I came on the server a few times, but I realised I shouldn't have. I regretted joining everytime I joined this past 7 days.
I noticed something is not allright anymore - I don't know if its the server, or is it me, or both, but I just came to a point where all I can think about is "Should I resign or not?".

Im not healthy at the moment. I am going through some weird time, where I just feel ill a lot. I get sick too much, and I can't deal with people in those situations.
I am a strong person, I've been through a lot - but I also learned that sometimes we need to let go.
I didn't really wanna resign because I like helping people, I love it. I like it when I can be useful, I like it when I can share my opinion (for example in meeting, or when other staff member needed help from me).
Alot of you guys came for help to me. Always. And I appriciate it that you guys can rely on me, its a good feeling.
However, being staff is very stressful. Even if I was only Admin.
I feel like I did my best, because I did a lot - and I felt that I was actually helpful etc.
I enjoyed being staff but I got so much negatives about it too, which Im not gonna list.
Lets just say - I got tired of those things. Tired of lies, people faking and also some attitudes.

I am very busy at school, I have always been the best student in my class. I want high grades always and I love getting them because I know school IS important for my future, even if it is one of the things that I hate the most.
For example, I wanted to come on and help with f1s, but I had 1 exam to study for and 1 essay to finish that night. It is just stressful and I don't want to ruin my school position for something online.

I don't know what you people think about me, but I enjoyed doing as much and as I could or just make your day better somehow.
It was great hearing people saying "Thank you for your help!" or "Wow you're amazing!" because it just made my day kind of better.

Basically, I've been through too much as a staff member. I got some attention even before I was staff, but as soon as I became staff - too much attention and drama was around me. I didn't like it, still don't like it.

I got to see some people's real sides and mostly fake sides, I can't say I liked most of them. It is just one of the worst things that I hate -> fake people. But thats not something that Im going to open (for not causing drama).

Im not going to mention a lot of people. Whoever gets a mention most likely isn't going to get mentioned cuz they are my friend (cuz im not leaving, just resigning). They are going to be mentioned since they helped me when I was a staff member.

NOTE: Not leaving, I don't feel like it. I might be inactive (kind of) because I don't really find too much interest coming on, or even TIME. But I will be active on teamspeak and the forums.

Tyler