TOPIC: Clearing the air.

Hello Everyone, I'm just here to clear the air what happend to me, i know its not really necasarry but i need to be said.

First of all, I want to apoligize to everyone who was seeing the drama in the OOC between me (xDutchCat) and Spudy, and i also want to apoligize for the homophobia.
Anyway, this is not what i was going to tell you about.

***STORY***
Last tuesday was the first time being back on ZARP. I Quitted playing zarp, not just because i was focussing on my mental health issues, moretheless the community is pretty toxic and back then the Staff Team was pretty blind.
What i mean by a "blind" staff team is that some staff members saw things through the fingers because of that player who got reported is a old and a long player.
So, back in the day I really wanted to talk to someone and I seriously didn't even had any intention to "seek" attention. Eventually like everyone who was not AFK in the server started a drama between me, because I "was seeking attention" because i have a CUSTOM TAG with: Lil Peep <3".

So after the millions of dicussions people told me to seriously end my life, to end myself, the admins were not even AFK. They were there.They even fucking heard what they said to me.
I Seriously was crying, but i never reported the admins. I Reported the players who even told me to kill myself, and the admins didnt do shit, they didnt even verbally warned them. They ignored me, they even muted me for "starting" a drama when i just wanted to talk to someone. a NORMAL HUMAN CONVERSATION.

I've told Joey yesterday about this story cause i really needed to clear the air, and I know its not really important. but i feel like i really had to.

***What I Should've done***
I didnt record it, i should've, or at least made screenshots.
- Reported the players
- Reported the Admins.
but i was scared, the thing is. I understand you need videoevidence that the admins can review it. But even in chatlogs admin ranks saw the guys talking to me and they said "Ur lying"
I Don't really know who the admins were back there were one of the "longest" in aswell...

Basically it is just really messed up this community. everyone always wants to believe the 'older guy'

Apparently normally having a conversation in RP is seeking attention.

I'm sorry for this long ass story but i really had to clear the air


- Dutch

Really sorry to hear about how you were treated by some individuals in the community, nobody should have to put up with comments encouraging suicide, or poking fun at your mental health. It's understandable that you would be mad, but like you said it doesn't excuse homophobia, everybody says stupid things they don't mean though, or just generally make mistakes and you can only go forward from here!

There are a number of people in the community that you can speak to if you want to get something off your chest, or just to hang out with someone when you're feeling low, including myself. Mental health is no joke, and shouldn't be taken as such, you aren't alone brother, take care!

If you ever feel alone and just want someone to speak to, I'm always available to speak
steam - steamcommunity.com/id/narexa/
discord - narexa#8815

Edit:
zarpgaming.com/index.php/forum/10-announ...ess-what-can-zarp-do
Here's a thread posted by one of the Owners of Zarp regarding mental health & suicide, so I can assure you, Zarp doesn't take lightly to this type of stuff.

Really want to thank you for the support, its just a pain since everything around you is like everyone is betraying you. Also like if someoen promises you not to raid u on rp and does so, when u even stay the night on so that guy can get more uranium.

Anyway my trust for like people is completely gone, idk what i can do rn, im just trying to have fun and not get spawnkilled in spawn lol.
Luckily George Bush stood up for me yesterday

I just want to say, nobody should be believing the "older guy" however it's important to note it is always based on what there's proof of. At ZARP we do not allow staff members to punish people just based on who they believe, as that would be wildly unfair and would lead to an incredibly large number of false punishments being handed out. We operate on an innocent until proven guilty basis, where if there is no proof, the user does not admit or the staff member did not witness the situation happening, then unfortunately nothing can really be done about it other than keeping an eye out in case it happens again and can be caught.

If you feel like any staff members have not been doing this, if they have been ignoring things that have happened or if you think they have treated you unfairly, please do feel free to make a report, even if you don't think you have any proof of what happened, as this can be a good way of telling us to keep an eye out to see if this is something that's happening and, in cases where anything has happened over chat, myself or another member of the Community Team will be able to help you out with getting some proof, as we can go through the server logs in case there is anything there (all that we need to do this is an approximate timeframe and the names/SteamIDs of anyone involved).

To reiterate what has already been said by narexa, this is something we take especially seriously. We don't tolerate any forms of discrimination, including on the basis of mental health, so if anything like this is happening ingame and you feel like the staff members are not handling it correctly and you're unable to record it, feel free to contact a member of the Lead Team or Community Team over Discord and we will get on as soon as possible to help resolve the situation. For contacting us, you can either join the ZARP Discord - discord.gg/AYeSSeb (the majority of us have our DMs set to mutual server members, so you shouldn't need to add us directly and wait for us to accept you) or check my Discord in my signature.

I Never made screenshots or videos cause my laptop cant handle a videoprogram unning with a game, and i ws scared and super upset to even think of making those screenshots

The Xnator,
Thank you, if i can i will let you guys know whenever there is something wrong. I understand you guys have a protocol to follow with videoproof to make sure to punish for exampe with an RDM. I should've contacted you guys earlier but i felt abandoned. I really appericiate it that you're being there and i will notify anything on the the lead of the staff team if something is really wrong

orbadoc wrote:
yeah idk the admin names anymore and date

I'm rather disgusted and shocked to hear what you had gone through, no one should have to endure such cruel and heartless provocations. As stated by both narexa and TheXnator, ZARP doesn't take such stuff lightly. As a staff team, we are here to ensure a safe and fun environment for all users of the community, we do not condone such barbaric and primitive behaviour. If I got wind about the staff team ignoring what was being said to you whilst I was still Lead Team, I'd have them all gone by the end of the week, that's the least they'd deserve.

You should not feel afraid to talk to people, nor to report users that might be harassing you. There are many people in the community who would be more than glad to give you a helping hand, no matter what you need. As you said, George stood up for you yesterday, he is truly an amazing guy and I can assure you that there are a lot more warmhearted people like him. If you'd like to, you can always message me either via Steam, Discord (Boris_#6743), or come to TeamSpeak to have a chat, if there's anything that's bothering you.

I had a different mindset about suicides a while back, though that all changed a few years back when I lost a good friend of mine, I can assure you, I was shattered, devastated and especially heartbroken - From that point onwards, I have a very different perspective on the subject at hand, and I'd be always willing to help anyone who needs it. Whatever you need, feel free to message me, I'll always be here to help, stay safe!

Mr. Richard wrote:

Thank you, if i need anything ill let you know. I Always knew you are one of the good guys aswell. Sorry to hear that you lost your good friend.

Iam still trying to heal from this devastating depression

Sorry to hear about this man, if you need anything message me on discord Pie#5468 or my steam Here!

Bump,

If you're ever experiencing horrible vibes or any kind of vibes, Feel free to contact me, I'm always open to talk to you. Especially during these days due to Covid19.
I'm always there if you need someone to talk to.
Stay strong out there bro's