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TOPIC: Hi

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167711

ZARP has been life changing for me and so it has also been a huge deal to me as well. Years of my life have been impacted and gone into this community. I've been away for about a week, contemplating on what I'm going to do next. I've now recently come back and have decided to resign from my role as SSRP Administrator (planned to not be able to revoke) and I have given away all of my items as well.

There are a few reasons that I've made these decisions and those reasons are (as I am stating them quite vaguely on purpose) as follows: The state of the Staff Team, the draught of content (until now), a few select persons, the general toxicity of the community and the fact that I can't play for more than 10 minutes on the server without attacking myself.

It has gotten to the point where I haven't used my voice online for about a month, as I highly dislike speaking in person as well, (It's simply a bit easier to do it online). Over some time I have been systematically and self-defeatingly destroying all relationships with everyone in this community (whether by just being myself or on purpose) for reasons that I'm unsure of. Speaking is simply too difficult and I've absolutely failed in my objective to better and serve others.

For those who wish to express their hatred on this post to either further or sustain your friend groups, I don't mind you doing it because it makes you feel better. For people who wish to post on this thread to gain clout in general, it's whatever. For those who post on this thread who genuinely mean to help me; your time is better suited and spent elsewhere.

I am not sure if I am 'quitting' ZARP, however that is most likely the case as I have quit most other things I have as well. I'm currently in the final stages of working out what I'm going to do to myself. But I do wish that everyone can be as happy as possible; including everyone I hate and everyone who dislikes me as well.

ZARP used to be my every-day distraction from my life and how I was feeling but as time went on, staffing became less and less effective for helping my various half-a-dozen disorders and now the community only seems to serve as something negative for me. I apologise to every single person for my disgusting behavior as a human being and I hope everything I've done as been at least half good enough to redeem myself. Specific apologies go out to:

Jack Bushross
Ryan Oneil
Smol
Niko
Joshua
Spicy Doggo
Trinidad James
Skeleton Warrior
Orange
Sally
Sammy
Sam the Sausage
Chute
Onion
Clarky
Overseer
Jammi

And many more people most of which (including on the list above) will never see this post. Thanks for reading if you did read. Once again, I'm genuinely so sorry for what I've done in this community and I wish i had done better; I deserve everything that's coming to me in my end. It is incredibly difficult to combat my own self (mental health) on a constant minute-by-minute basis. I've had over 15 years to plan and create contingencies and fall-backs for situations like these but this time I am burning through nearly a decade and a half of contingencies. The resignation is necessary as if this continues I will not be able to play for quite some time and there's no reason to be staff when I haven't been playing anyway. Due to SSRP being a source of negativity for me on top of all the other previously stated reasons, I gave all of my things away so that I wouldn't keep coming back.

❤︎ Once again, thanks for reading and have a nice rest of your days/nights.❤︎

Dramn
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Rawr! xd
Posts: 619
Thanks received: 242
Karma: 10

Last Edit: 5 years 1 month ago by Dramn.

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The following user(s) said Thank You: EiPUS, OnionRings, ryan oneil, Sam the Sausage, Clarky and 8 more...

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167712

bye	Markus Offline Legendary Member Posts: 5349 Thanks received: 1634 Karma: -337
Former: SSRP Superadmin Community Council Creator (May it rest in piece) Prophunt Moderator BHOP Moderator Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167716

Delete this comment as people keep assuming things	Suken Offline User is blocked The CoinFlipper Posts: 1074 Thanks received: 104 Karma: 0
current rank: EX: Semi-serious Roleplay Administrator Last Edit: 5 years 1 month ago by Suken. Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167719

Suken wrote: i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you	Clarky Offline Former Community Manager I love Henny Posts: 16826 Thanks received: 9584 Karma: 983
Login or register to post a reply. The following user(s) said Thank You: EiPUS, SorIe, narexa, Smol, iFreshFruit and 2 more...

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167720

Suken wrote: i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you	User1502 Offline User is blocked Posts: 4550 Thanks received: 820 Karma: 5
Login or register to post a reply. The following user(s) said Thank You: A Good Pianist, Smol

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167721

Suken wrote: i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you your part of the reason shes leaving you nonce. Also bye dramn!!! always welcome back to zarp you was a huge player	jack bushross Offline Former Community Manager Posts: 2155 Thanks received: 4929 Karma: 29
SSRP- Super Administrator Login or register to post a reply. The following user(s) said Thank You: schnitzel nazi, Micky, Smol

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167722

Thank you for your work Dramn, you were a solid admin and helped out a lot when you could Take care and all the best	.uzi Offline Former Community Manager Foos yer doos? Posts: 6007 Thanks received: 2443 Karma: 123
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Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167723

wtf is wrong with y all!!??/	Suken Offline User is blocked The CoinFlipper Posts: 1074 Thanks received: 104 Karma: 0
current rank: EX: Semi-serious Roleplay Administrator Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167724

Suken wrote: i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you God doesn't agree with suicide you fucking mongoloid.	Dramn Offline Senior Boarder Rawr! xd Posts: 619 Thanks received: 242 Karma: 10
Login or register to post a reply. The following user(s) said Thank You: OnionRings, Jesu, Smol, iFreshFruit

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167725

Goodbye! Take care and good luck!	EiPUS Offline Diamond Boarder Slip Inside The Eye Of Your Mind Posts: 3837 Thanks received: 2035 Karma: 14
Ex. SSRP Super Administrator Ex. Forum Global Moderator Ex. BHOP Administrator Ex. TeamSpeak Staff Ex. Discord staff Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167727

I can say with great confidence that you are one of, if not, the best Administrator I had the chance to work with, you have put so much time and effort into ZARP and it is greatly appreciated. I wish all the best for you, and if you ever need anything, you know where to contact me... Farewell Dramn...	Mr. Richard Offline Map Developer Posts: 9512 Thanks received: 5461 Karma: 188
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Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167731

well fuck if ur serious with going ahead with this then c u on the metaphorical other side, but talk to me on steam first click icon in sig	SorIe Offline Marvelous Boarder Posts: 10840 Thanks received: 4296 Karma: 400
ex-dog LT member on many servers Last Edit: 5 years 1 month ago by SorIe. Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167736

I have no idea what you are apologizing to me for but goodbye you were a good staff member, take care! You can always dm me on discord if you need anything	JoshuaIsGreat Offline Diamond Boarder 3^ the Serb Posts: 3627 Thanks received: 1549 Karma: -236
a ^{3^ the Serb JayHouse on top forever, fuck around and find out Zarp SSRP Lawyer} Last Edit: 5 years 1 month ago by JoshuaIsGreat. Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167755

Well this was unexpected. It might be a little late but something you should try is just laughing off shit people say to you and try to not let it get to you. Anyways you were a great staff member, hopefully you’ll come back soon. Bye bye, buddy (that’s some insane alliteration, big up Mrs. Price, best English teacher ever)	Micky Offline Mythical Boarder Posts: 5775 Thanks received: 7911 Karma: -42
Last Edit: 5 years 1 month ago by Micky. Login or register to post a reply. The following user(s) said Thank You: schnitzel nazi

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167760

Thanks for all your help! gl in whatever u do next Dramn4LM :3	Jesu Offline Expert Boarder ✡Jewish Mafia \| Wikipedia⚛️ Posts: 1330 Thanks received: 173 Karma: 4
SSRP-Admin Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167761

Suken wrote: i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you	maybedovahkitty Offline User is blocked Бог мертв Posts: 7710 Thanks received: 1225 Karma: -75
Most people are searching for happiness. They’re looking for it. They’re trying to find it in someone or something outside of themselves. That’s a fundamental mistake. Happiness is something that you are, and it comes from the way you think. Last Edit: 5 years 1 month ago by maybedovahkitty. Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167768

Dramn wrote:

Suken wrote:

i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you

God doesn't agree with suicide you fucking mongoloid.

This actually isn't entirely true. Suicide is a mortal sin, however, for something to be considered a mortal sin, the individual must have complete free will. The Catholic church has changed their stance on suicide a bit ago, and basically claims that if the person is under severe mental stress (mental illness is usually the cause), that individual did not have free will and therefore it is not a mortal sin. "The church acknowledges, however, that most people who die by suicide suffer from mental illness and are thus incapable of making a clear, rational decision." - Pope John Paul II
If you are religious, what I would recommend for you to do is go to a church and repent all your sins to a priest. If you feel this isn't possible, I would pray to God and repent what you have done and/or what you are about to do.
Sorry if you aren't religious and felt this was no better than a bible ranter on the side of the street, but I felt it was necessary for you to know. Again, if you don't believe, then you can just ignore this part. I am also not trying to force my religion or views on anyone, but from this reply you gave I decided to write this so you have the option.
Of course, the "suicide isn't the answer", is cliche but true. I wont be spouting that over and over, and instead recommend that you contact crisis services in Canada. The number is 1.833.456.4566, or you can text them at 45645. It wouldn't hurt if you haven't tried it already.
You can also contact me on steam or discord if you feel you need to speak to somebody.

Henny
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Legendary Member
LLHA
Posts: 2975
Thanks received: 2235
Karma: 24

Ex - TTT Server Owner
Ex - TF2 HA, Prophunt SA
Ex - SSRP Administrator

Last Edit: 5 years 1 month ago by Henny.

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Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167769

Henny wrote:

Im going to go more into the religious side of this, so if you don't believe in God or care for Catholicism you can just ignore me

Dramn wrote:

Suken wrote:

i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you

God doesn't agree with suicide you fucking mongoloid.

This actually isn't entirely true. Suicide is a mortal sin, however, for something to be considered a mortal sin, the individual must have complete free will. The Catholic church has changed their stance on suicide a bit ago, and basically claims that if the person is under severe mental stress (mental illness is usually the cause), that individual did not have free will and therefore it is not a mortal sin. "The church acknowledges, however, that most people who die by suicide suffer from mental illness and are thus incapable of making a clear, rational decision." - Pope John Paul II
What I would recommend for you to do is go to a church and repent all your sins to a priest. If you feel this isn't possible, I would pray to God and repent what you have done and/or what you are about to do.
Sorry if you aren't religious and felt this was no better than a bible ranter on the side of the street, but I felt it was necessary for you to know. Again, if you don't believe, then you can just ignore this part. I am also not trying to force my religion or views on anyone, but from this reply you gave I decided to write this so you have the option.
Of course, the "suicide isn't the answer", is cliche but true. I wont be spouting that over and over, and instead recommend that you contact crisis services in Canada. The number is 1.833.456.4566, or you can text them at 45645. It wouldn't hurt if you haven't tried it already. Admitting yourself into an university hospital might be an option as well. I say university hospital as they are usually good at handling situations like this.
You can also contact me on steam or discord if you feel you need to speak to somebody.

Christianity has been changed throughout century's there are so many mistakes and false claims in the bible, and the bible does not claim to be the word of god so how you gonna repent ?

TrixX
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Expert Boarder
Muslamic Vision
Posts: 892
Thanks received: 284
Karma: -28

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Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167770

Trix wrote:

Henny wrote:

Im going to go more into the religious side of this, so if you don't believe in God or care for Catholicism you can just ignore me

Dramn wrote:

Suken wrote:

i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you

God doesn't agree with suicide you fucking mongoloid.

This actually isn't entirely true. Suicide is a mortal sin, however, for something to be considered a mortal sin, the individual must have complete free will. The Catholic church has changed their stance on suicide a bit ago, and basically claims that if the person is under severe mental stress (mental illness is usually the cause), that individual did not have free will and therefore it is not a mortal sin. "The church acknowledges, however, that most people who die by suicide suffer from mental illness and are thus incapable of making a clear, rational decision." - Pope John Paul II
What I would recommend for you to do is go to a church and repent all your sins to a priest. If you feel this isn't possible, I would pray to God and repent what you have done and/or what you are about to do.
Sorry if you aren't religious and felt this was no better than a bible ranter on the side of the street, but I felt it was necessary for you to know. Again, if you don't believe, then you can just ignore this part. I am also not trying to force my religion or views on anyone, but from this reply you gave I decided to write this so you have the option.
Of course, the "suicide isn't the answer", is cliche but true. I wont be spouting that over and over, and instead recommend that you contact crisis services in Canada. The number is 1.833.456.4566, or you can text them at 45645. It wouldn't hurt if you haven't tried it already. Admitting yourself into an university hospital might be an option as well. I say university hospital as they are usually good at handling situations like this.
You can also contact me on steam or discord if you feel you need to speak to somebody.

Christianity has been changed throughout century's there are so many mistakes and false claims in the bible, and the bible does not claim to be the word of god so how you gonna repent ?

Im not going to get into a debate on religion in this thread. God was brought up so I left my views on this.
Believe what you want.

Henny
Offline
Legendary Member
LLHA
Posts: 2975
Thanks received: 2235
Karma: 24

Ex - TTT Server Owner
Ex - TF2 HA, Prophunt SA
Ex - SSRP Administrator

Login or register to post a reply.

Hi 5 years 1 month ago #1167771

Henny wrote:

Trix wrote:

Henny wrote:

Im going to go more into the religious side of this, so if you don't believe in God or care for Catholicism you can just ignore me

Dramn wrote:

Suken wrote:

i hope to see you soon good girl <3 hope that things get better may god be with you

God doesn't agree with suicide you fucking mongoloid.

This actually isn't entirely true. Suicide is a mortal sin, however, for something to be considered a mortal sin, the individual must have complete free will. The Catholic church has changed their stance on suicide a bit ago, and basically claims that if the person is under severe mental stress (mental illness is usually the cause), that individual did not have free will and therefore it is not a mortal sin. "The church acknowledges, however, that most people who die by suicide suffer from mental illness and are thus incapable of making a clear, rational decision." - Pope John Paul II
What I would recommend for you to do is go to a church and repent all your sins to a priest. If you feel this isn't possible, I would pray to God and repent what you have done and/or what you are about to do.
Sorry if you aren't religious and felt this was no better than a bible ranter on the side of the street, but I felt it was necessary for you to know. Again, if you don't believe, then you can just ignore this part. I am also not trying to force my religion or views on anyone, but from this reply you gave I decided to write this so you have the option.
Of course, the "suicide isn't the answer", is cliche but true. I wont be spouting that over and over, and instead recommend that you contact crisis services in Canada. The number is 1.833.456.4566, or you can text them at 45645. It wouldn't hurt if you haven't tried it already. Admitting yourself into an university hospital might be an option as well. I say university hospital as they are usually good at handling situations like this.
You can also contact me on steam or discord if you feel you need to speak to somebody.

Christianity has been changed throughout century's there are so many mistakes and false claims in the bible, and the bible does not claim to be the word of god so how you gonna repent ?

Im not going to get into a debate on religion in this thread. God was brought up so I left my views on this.
Believe what you want.

I'm only asking cause i'm interested, so far no christian or catholic was able to give me an answer..