TOPIC: Im sorry...

Im writing this because i feel like i own you all an apology. Right now im working on an update that has been a very slow process for me, and which is the reason why it hasn't came out yet, and i feel like i want to tell you why.

I live in a family where they only live up to expectations. My dad is in one of the highest position of jobs you could be on a hospital (aka lead team), and he have the biggest expectations for me and my future. in other words he wants to make me do something impossible for me to do. My dad started to ignore me and focussed on my little brother, eventho i live home together with him. Which hurts me very much. In about 4 months i finish college which was my dads choice to take to begin with. I have to move out and i have no clue of what to do next. In 4 months i have to take some actions that represent who i am. But it destroys me, all this stress with college, work, girlfriend, expectations. Its killing me, i have thoughts that i never throughs i would think before.

To be honest i feel like a messed up person, and person who is fucked up and can't figure out how to use his life right. I hope you all can forgive me for not working 100% functional right now. and i know this thread maybe gives no sense. But right now im at that point that i cry myself to bed, and i can't stop it.

So to end this, im sorry for not being the best map developer right now, and i know a guy could replace me at any time. I hope that you all forgive me and can give me some time to find myself again and maybe gain my dads and friends expectations back.

And no this is not a resignation, just an apology
I love you all.
-Patrick_TM

np take your time

Release Evilmelon pelase

Don’t apologise.
You’re fucking amazing bro, nobody is perfect, and nobody can control you. Look for something you love and find a way that you can make it into your job.
Don’t push yourself too hard, we all know how much work you put in.

irl > zarp
sort your life out first man then worry about zarp because zarp won't be here forever
keep your head up

Wtf, Patrick, I had no idea you kept this inside of you man. The fact that you're crying yourself to bed really touches me. I hope you can overcome your current problems and get through it. You can do it, I'm sure you can. Just stick to what you believe you can do and what you know you have to achieve. We can wait for a map update, but you can't wait for your life. So please focus on the right things, rather than this community. I'm sure you'll get through it. Please don't overwork yourself and focus on ZARP when you have more important things on your mind.

Good luck man, and if you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm still on Steam for a chat!

hope you’ll be alright man

never apologise !!!

Nafe wrote:
Dude are you fucking serious right now? He’s going through some shit in his life and he should focus on his life more and then he comes on he forums to tell us this issue and you go out of your way to tell him to release Evilmelon. Nafe just get out of here and respect people for once.


Anyways aside that, Patrick there is no need to stress yourself over Zarp. Your life is more important, who cares if you don’t have the map done. Don’t focus on Zarp and focus on your life first man. Best of luck bro!

Nafe wrote: You are SO rude.. Holy cow.. How can you even do this?



Patrick, you dont have to say sorry man.. We appreciate your work on zarp, but real life stuff
is way more important, take some time off. No need to stress even more.
If you need anything, message me man, danes help each other!
Hope everything is gonna turn out to be OK. Prove to your father that you can do by your own, and achieve
stuff by yourself. You got this bud!

Patrick you are an amazing person with a big heart and do a lot for this community there is no need to apologise and I recommend you take the time you need for now. If you ever need anything hit me up and we can talk.

All the best,
Max

We love you too <3

Nafe wrote: like is it even close to being done?

Patrick I have sent you a more personal message directly but I will write here too briefly we wish you all the best with your personal life, we know you will be successful in whatever you do. We are all excited to see your next map update but please concentrate on your personal life first. All the best!

Chuteuk wrote:
Chute and Pariz are great guys that do so much for the community, sadly alot of people take it for granted.

OnionRings wrote:
lol

Thank you all for the nice words guys. It means a hell lot to me
I cant write to each person right now since i have to go to college in about 10 minuts. But really, you guys help me alot, thank you

patrick you are a great guy, YOU dont need to stay at zarp man, its not like they are forcing you to stay and finish your work.

Always remember, irl > zarp.

<right now I am probably just gonna be on ts, barely on any zarp servers, just because I am leaving till summer, I need to work for my grades, so I can get into the "vidergående" school that I want to get into, and so I can work on my license for my 125cc

So remember irl > zarp. Im sure your dad will be proud of you

OnionRings wrote:
shut up crybaby it was obviously a joke lol

Don't be sorry it's not your fault.