Your application seems to me a bit rushy, It looked like you've taken 5 minutes to write it out, I'd write more on the "Why me" part, I'll check your activity in the section you're applying for.

Your application seems to me a bit rushy, It looked like you've taken 5 minutes to write it out, I'd write more on the "Why me" part, I'll check your activity in the section you're applying for.