TOPIC: My daughter will be a Satanic Demon Empress

This story is the reason why I love Crusader Kings 2 so fucking much.

First a brief explanation what the game is. In short it's a Game of Thrones simulator: you play as a character in the medieval ages and need to ensure that your dynasty thrives, or at the very least survives. Your character must own a title (a city, duchy, kingdom, empire, etc.) and when the character dies, you'll play as their heir. Who that heir is depends on which succesion laws your titles have, but usually it's the oldest son or daughter.

Know enough? Okay, so now what exactly happened.

I started the game in 1066 as the Duke of Holland, a 13 year old child with 2 titles. A couple of sisters were available to me, I simply married them off to some lord somewhere for a few alliances that turned out quite shit. The interesting thing was - something I didn't know ahead of time - is that I started as the heir to the Duchy of Saxony. My uncle held that title at the time, and had no children of his own. When I would become of age - 15 years old - I would plot to kill my uncle and inherit his titles.

Good plan, right? Well, it turned out not as good - as usual, obviously.

When I finally became of age, my uncle got a son who became the new heir. That was a bit of an issue, so I had to kill that son first. Thankfully I wasn't the only one that would love to see that child crushed to pieces, so with the help of a few others we managed to kill him.

Sadly enough it was discovered that I was the one responsible for the child's death, so my uncle and his wife hated me now. Thankfully his wife was past the age of bearing a child (or so I hoped) and all I had to do was wait until he would hit the bucket.

I expected that to take longer than it did, as a year later my uncle died of an illness and the Duchy of Saxony was mine. I went to war against Zeeland, a province under Holland with a De Jure claim and took the province for myself. With that title under my name as well, I had enough land in the area to forge the title of the Kingdom of Frisia.

Now crowned a king, I had to prepare myself for the future.

I had been producing many children over the years, and I had to choose wisely which one would be married of where. Eventually however I got a child that turned out to be a bit of a nuisance.

It turned out that the Spawn of Satan had manifested itself in one of my many daughters.

Frightened, I wasn't sure what I could do. I could not kill my own child, as much as I did want to, so I had to just watch and see how she would turn out.

When she was three years of age, the first strange occurance happened.

My eldest daughter, the pride of my joy and the happines of my life perished under suspicious circumstances. One night she started screaming in her sleep, spitting demonic curses and coughing blood. I gazed down upon her before she let out her final breath, as her shouts finally ended and her body began going limp. I forgot her name, but I shall never forget her face.

T̶͢h̨é҉ ̨͏͝f͜͠a̶c͠҉͟e̸̢ ̀͝o̴̡͟f̵̛͜ ̷pu͟r͏͜e̢̧҉ ͝͡͝ḩ͜o҉͘͠r̶҉o҉ŗ͠ an̶̸d͝͏ ͝҉t̕͝e͢͢r̨̡̕ro̷r͜.̸͢

And as I looked behind me, I saw my three year old daughter, with an insane smile on her face. She appeared to be laughing, though whatever came out of her mouth was nothing human or anything that could be described as a joyous emotion.

Over the years, more strange occurences repeated themselves. My second eldest daughter got killed in a similar manner not long after the first, and the third one literally woke up insane, only to die a few months later shouting that "Satan had come."

And as I conquered more titles, and lost more of my family, my wife and I finally got a little baby boy. The heir of my kingdom, the love of my life, the one that would do many great things. I named him after myself, Dirk Dirkszoon, and was impressed by his growth.

For a while I was scared what my daughter would do against him. Would she envy him? Would she kill him? However as months went by without any kind of hostility between the two, my concerns faded away. The two even seemed on good terms, as she volunteered to play with him and he seemed to enjoy her company.

Yet after a little over a year after his birth, he happened to die in his sleep. He bled out of his eyes and cried deep into the night, until he eventually passed away from this world.

And so I was left with a few daughters, and a single heir. My Satanic Demon daughter.

However, I would not let such an opportunity go to waste. Recently the Holy Roman Emperor supported his daughter-in-law's claim on the throne of England. The prince's wife. He succeeded in placing her upon that throne, and thus the Queen of England was also the Wife to heir to the Holy Roman Empire. The two had their own children, all unmarried. This included a son.

Grabbing this opportunity, I proposed a betrothal to the Emperor. Marry my daughter matrilineally with your grandson. He accepted.

My daughter's children will now be of my dynasty. Thus when my daughter dies, her child inherits all titles. The Holy Roman Empire, The Kingdom of England and all other titles they might hold, such as the Kingdom of Frisia and some minor holdings.

My Satanic daughter will become a Queen, an Empress and will rule the world with an iron fist.

And they say that Dutch counts can't get far, huh.

My brain exploded

I cba to read

Edgy game!

TL;DR?

Well, fuck no I am not reading that damn.

I thought it was going to say My daughter with john satanic LOL

Loll mind blown

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Bump Bump Bunp Bump BUMP

BUUUUUUUUUUUMP

BUUUUUUUUMP
Small bump for raeker

stop making threads tooo long to read, reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

what i cool game man whats the name? read all because i loved the story xd

Well at least you're not the one doing Satanic sacrifices now...

TheXnator wrote: His character died... and he took over his daughter then did do these things...

Akemi and Anna wrote:
Well last time he tried to fuck his half sister and sacrificed her to Satan when she said no....

So I despair for this kingdon

TheXnator wrote: I only ruled for like a year or so. The emperor burned me at the stake.

TL;DR

You have an unhealthy habit of this game Raeker

CrankyBot wrote:
What's unhealthy about it

TheXnator wrote:
When he yells out on teamspeak

"YES MY UNCLE IS DEAD FUCK YEAH"

what the fuck happened with germany

i have no idea what you guys are talking about