TOPIC: Raeker Says Sorry

So, for some people this might come across as a little strange. There will definitely be some users out there that do not understand why I'm making this thread right now. And although I have already apologized to most of the people on this list I still felt the need to make this post.

As most people know, I'm a very kind and forgiving person. You can insult the living shit out of me, you can call me a faggot and tell me to kill myself (not in GTA) and I'll laugh it off. I'll still respond to you in a calm, collected manner, telling you my opinions whilst not judging you for what you said to me.

There are others that would scream back at an user like that, but not me.

To be fair, I guess that it could almost be impossible for some people to imagine me as angry. It'd be even harder for most people to imagine me yelling at someone.

And before this week, I would have a hard time imagining it too. I have only ever properly yelled once, and that was during a meeting when people were completely ignoring a clear rulebreak. Never did I yell at them directly though - I adressed them as a group, I did not yell at each person individually.

Then last Sunday a problem arose within the TTT staff team. I adressed the people in a spacer, and as they were refusing to listen to what I was trying to tell them I got relatively upset. However, instead of keeping my calm attitude and explain to them properly why and how they were wrong, I yelled at them instead.

To be fair, it wouldn't surprise me if they got a little frightened because of it, as it seemingly came out of nowhere. Heck, it scared even myself - I really did not expect something like that to come out of my mouth.

Naturally, I immediately apologized and explained to them that if they were bothered by it that they should approach me. Heck, this goes to everyone: if I ever bother you (somehow) then just tell me so we can talk it out.

I was unsure why I yelled at them. Yes, I was annoyed that they didn't immediately realize that the things they did were wrong even though I told them that, but it was still entirely wrong for me to turn so aggressive.

Either way, it happened and I apologized. Not much I could do about it now, and I simply continued on with my life, doing things, making mistakes occasionally but learning from them all the same. Then, a few days afterwards, there was an issue with another staff member. I was trying to explain to them that whatever a Super Admin told them was wrong. Instead, they ignored what I told them and sided with the Super Admin anyway.

To be fair, as irritating as that might be, it was not a reason to yell at him. He was simply siding by what another staff member told him, and although I tried to make it very clear that that was not the right thing to do in this case (and him ignoring that) yelling to another staff who believes he's doing the right thing is never a good thing.

I'm extremely sorry to all these people for shouting at them. I should never yell at anyone - it's simply not an okay thing to do. The fact that I take death-threats regularly but people not listening to me so aggresively does scare me to some extent, but I'll be sure to watch out for any further outbursts.

I'm not going to give excuses like "I'm tired" or "I'm going through a stressful part of my life right now". Even if it were true, it's not going to help anyone.

I'd like to apologize to the following people:

If you read it all, thank you. If you didn't, I thank you still. I should not have said and done the things I have.

Sorry.

Forgiven

Fuck them for not listening

AceInsidious wrote: Doesn't mean I should yell at them still.

How could anyone be angry at you ? Here, let's have a bro hug

They should have listened to you in the first place. You are so nice and patient, if it made you yell, it must have been quite something, and anyone in your place would have done worse

It's good that you came out with the apology.

I'm somewhat familiar with the situation that happened on Sunday - I would have been mad too had I'd be on your position. And being the Cranky I am I would have yelled as well (probably not as wise but people are different from everyone - no two are the same) or some really stupid shit.

We all have our moments where we break down because of stress and reveal a certain... characteristic that's not usually shown.

Again it's good that you decided to be apologetic towards those who may have been affected by your characteristic feature that's uncommon.

Will always respect you as a Head Admin no matter how calm and non-strict you may be buddy

Chienman wrote: That's the thing, I don't think it was that important a thing to yell at them. Sure, I might think that it's never fine to yell at someone, but even in these cases I do not believe it was that big of a mistake they made.

Raeker wrote:
I would of used my earrape soundboard to get there attention again. But seriously this is not even apology worth. They Simply didn't listen and you raised your voice to get there attention again. Simple as that

Considering you apologized to them in the spacer and they understood, and plus added onto making a thread that could've taken minutes to write, apology would definitely be accepted, even though I wasn't even impacted.

I dont think you should feel bad about this. A person can only stay calm for so long it is nature. Now I don't know why you had to yell but knowing you there was a reason behind it. Anyways I forgive you for anything you do

brenzor9137 wrote: Just to clarify, I do not believe the things they did warranted me yelling at them.

Thx

No one is looking at you to always be calm and no one should hold it against you for yelling at someone if you think they did something wrong. And you shouldn't hold yourself back for that, some people might take advantage of that. I might not know the whole story but for the time I've known you, you've never yelled that is true, but as I said don't hold it back.

Not saying you should change completely, no quite the opposite. Saying sorry to people who you are strongly sure did something wrong don't deserve a "sorry" from you. Those who you accidentally insulted in any way those are the ones you should say sorry.

You did a brave thing by saying all of this tho and I say good job! <3

completely normal, you are only a human after all. But do you actually get death threats?I was shocked reading that tbh.

man if i said sorry for the shit you said sorry for I would've had to say sorry thousands of times

its human nature honestly, even if you dont believe that it warranted such a reaction, it gets to a point where youve just taken enough over all in life and you need to let it out, which is fully understandable

while I tend to vent to you a lot, let me know if you ever need the same because I can definitely repay the favour whenever you need me

you're a good guy and we all appreciate you

but now i feel really bad because i was the root cause of both of these and i couldve very easily prevented the first situation from going as far as it did, but due to my personality i decided that i needed to get the last word in even when it was a losing argument

McOxygen wrote:
I mean it's Raeker we're talking about .

I would have eaten my microphone so they hear me . you're great guy, you really are.

Lowskii wrote: I got my first one this week, quite honestly made me chuckle. But like I said, I remained calm and told the user I didn't hate him for saying that. He apologized and we're all good now
sorle wrote: I think I'm good, thanks though. Mostly tired right now, but perhaps some other time when I'm less tired and in a better state of mind I might take you up for that talk. Thanks man.

Raeker calm he likes rice in his palm ignore his help and end up like a pachuari naan

Raeker your such a good guy man it makes me want to be a good guy, idk how anyone can dislike you to be honest.

Sorry is a word most people loving hearing so don't sweat it I am sure they knew you never mean't it