TOPIC: What it's like being me (EDIT!)

"How Foster functions is beyond the realms of reason, beyond any disability he may have.. .he just functions."-My best friend Jonathon

Alright, so I got a few suggestions to post the mental disorders I suffer from on here so people don't make certain mistakes that drive me mad. As an extra, bonus I will describe myself a little as well!

Alright so here we go!
My name is Foster, some people call me Forest due to my stature and wiseness. I have a deep fascination in the mind due to my own status and have dedicated myself to understanding those around me as best I can. I also have an interest in writing, writing short stories and hope to eventually cobble together a novel.

Constantly, due to my anxieties I feel like I could never fit in, or never be fully understood.. like I am a true foreign object or an alien from outer space.

Below is a list of disorders I suffer from
High functioning autism
Severe ADHD (Used to have meds but suppressed mentally after I graduated)
Alice in wonderland
Aspergers
PTSD (Triggered by group laughter when I am trying to be serious)
Complex Nerve Developmental Disorder
Bi-polar disorder
Seasonal depressional disorder
Social Anxiety Disorder
High levels of anxiety and high levels of depression (Mostly about everything in life but I keep it in check for the most part).

Some things I cannot discuss on this forum, if you wish to ask me about more personal stuff then don't be afraid to ask by looking for me on these social outlets below

Skype: sigiloftheequinox
Steam: Relcodem

I like and respect you for the fact you dont use these as excuses like alot of people do (real life too not just online)
Im also so glad you dont do stuff like abusing people then just saying "sorry I have adhd I couldnt help it"

You are a great guy Rel! Sad to see that people are suffering from those diseases and you even have more then one! Massive respect towards you man!

Dude it was big of you to post this... Especially from what happened on TeamSpeak. I'm really proud of you

Well most of them developed after the age of 12, though my AIW may have been around since I was born.

I will explain alice in wonderland quickly for you folk.

Its a visual, auditory and sense of time disorder.

Visually, it causes objects I look at to fluctuate, either getting bigger or smaller as I stare, or appear to move side to side.
Auditory, it causes sounds to feel alot more loud then they are. For example, a tiny whisper in another room is amplified and causes my ears a kind of phantom pain and gives me a migraine.

For memory and time, it distorts them, for example I am unable to keep a clock in my head for any reasonable time, my memory is also warped... its one of the leading causes for my memory issues. Memories no longer have time stamps, my older memories kind of do but current forming memories simply cannot be accessed immediately.

An example, you are walking your dog and BAM your suddenly back home, its just your sense of time in regards to memory is so warped its a kind of temporary amnesia sometimes.

These symptoms are amplified depending on my sleep schedule and are harder to nail down.

Damn dude, That's stressful!

Damn dude even with all this your a great staff member !

MINI NINJA wrote:
Its unbelievable that you are able to handle all this, and be a great staff member at the same time...
Proud of you <3

that's a lot of shit man, i've been at dark points but they seem like nothing compared to this. something that could help some of these is cannabis however if you're not in a legal place then it's not really something i'd advise.

I can't say I've ever heard of Alice in Wonderland, but your explanation makes sense. This post was real brave of you.

I he helped me a lot today, telling me stuff about this

Just saying that this post is really inspiring to me, and You're really brave to post this kind of thing, I know I never could.

Finally someone who has more problems then me , but seriously brave of you to post and if you ever need someone to talk to you know where to find me.

From my interactions with you I would have never guessed you suffer with these things. I'd say that means you manage it pretty well, though it's hard to gauge everything right over the internet

Alice in wonderland? Good memes lol

It's just great to hear you do so well despite all this.

First of all. I am so glad that you are such a strong person coping with all of this. I also want to say that I am thankful for you tellings us what you are struggling with. Maybe it can help us to help you?

Anyways, you are a strong and brave man and I am glad to be one of your collegues.

What everyone said, you're a great guy and a great staff member. Keep it up!

Alright! So next on the list of things to explain si something you can't find online its called complex nerve developmental disorder.

Basically, my nerves developed more then they should, way more nerves per area then neccesary.

Because of this, pain is amplified and if I am so much as poked it feels like a needle scratching into my skin.

As well, I am unable to write with my hand, as tiny movements in my wrist are exaggerated as the extra impulses are sent to my muscles due to the increased amount of nerves.

listening to this song while reading this makes it even sadder


I've never interacted with you ingame, but it takes a lot of courage to speak about all that on here, nothing but respect towards you dude.